HE SAID: Strike One... You're Out?

Should I stay? If so, why should I stay? Should I leave? Guys, if your significant other has cheated on you, you should think about the situation and ask yourself a LONG series of questions. Did you actually catch them? Or worse, did you catch them in the act? Sometimes it's easier to deal with a problem if you don't witness it in person because psychologically the scenario may haunt you forever (or until the relationship does end).  Did your partner actually tell you that it happened and that it was a horrible mistake? If you have a relationship that's exceptionally special to you, then you should realize that your partner has made a horrible mistake and forgive, but not forget. Wounds take time to heal, but they can and DO heal.

               How long have you been together officially: weeks, a few months, years? If not long at all, LEAVE IMMEDIATELY. The person is wasting your time and does not respect you at all. On the other hand, if the two of you have been together for a decent amount of time, it may be that your partner is just unhappy, sexually or emotionally and just needs comfort. If you can work through that, then all smiles to you; Congratulations! If not, you should look at yourself and ask: "Is it me or them?" If the answer is yes to either question, maybe you should exit the relationship because there is the ‘wasting time issue', and life is too short.

               Were you completely shocked when you found out? Did you kind of already suspect that it was happening? If you expected that it was going on you should know that your partner is "not that into you"; take the hint and break up. An unhappy relationship is not a good thing. I'd rather be unhappy by myself than unhappy with a mate. Along with that, ask yourself if you are happy with the relationship because this may be the excuse you need to escape the relationship if you are not happy.

               Ask yourself, "Would I cheat back, if I could get away with it?" If you answer yes to this question, you most definitely shouldn't be with your mate, because you are not into them in a sexual/romantic way. Maybe you should just be friends (which isn't a bad thing), or just be in an open relationship if all you're going to do is cheat! You could also be ‘friends with benefits.'

               A female friend of mine says, "Stay! Everyone is human and makes mistakes, but if the cheating is continuous you should leave." I agree with this 100%, and it wraps up this column. Good luck with your relationship, but remember that YOU are most important. If you don't love yourself, how are you going to love someone else?