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SHE SAID: Strike One... You're Out?

The Possibility of a Second Chance after Cheating

On September 27, 2011

As another fall semester begins, I am faced with new classes, new students and a new internship. (You could say I have my hands full.) With new beginnings around every corner, it is hard not to be bombarded by thoughts of second chances. You can reinvent your wardrobe, your GPA and your group of friends, but can you reinvent a relationship after someone has been unfaithful? Is it even possible to start anew and forgive and forget? Where does one even begin to repair the damage? 

            I once heard the saying, "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me." To cut it short, when giving someone a second chance you run the risk of being hurt again. If and when that mistrust is experienced again, the blame is on you for giving that person a second chance to begin with. (You now look like a fool, not the best feeling in the world.) If your partner cheats on you once, what will stop them from doing it again? If your boyfriend truly loves and respects you, then why would he ever want to be with someone else? These questions are some you will be confronted with after experiencing a partner's infidelity.

            The idea that it is vital to "forgive and forget" is complete stupidity to me. Readers, in no way am I telling you it is a good idea to hold grudges, but I do know it is a good idea to have enough self-worth and self -respect to walk away from a situation in which your significant other OBVIOUSLY has no respect for you. There is never an excuse for cheating on your partner, and whatever excuse or reasoning they compile to win you back is just going to make you feel like less of a person in the long run. You are severely emotionally damaged, and it is a good idea to spend some alone time to gather your thoughts and see in what direction you want your life to go. Don't focus on how angry or sad you are, but rather what road you need to take to continue living your life and enjoying what it has to offer (with or without him).

            I don't believe that "once a cheater always a cheater," but I do know there is some hidden layer of truth to the accusation. Cheating really shows how unprepared someone is for a serious relationship; Immaturity and infidelity go hand in hand. Eventually you two could work things out and possibly re route your relationship, but for right now I suggest that you take things a day at a time by focusing on yourself. Loyalty is respect and respect is love; there is someone for everyone, and you need to keep moving and NEVER look back. The road life brings you down will find you love, but staying with a cheater will find you nothing but lost sleep and lost time you can never get back. Liberate yourself and take charge of your own life!

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