* They’re not experts, but they’re willing to give you their take on your problems. Email questions and problems to scribe@bridgeport.edu
— I’m juggling two boyfriends, one lives down the street from my parents and the other one has been hinting that he would like to come hang with me for the holidays. What should I do? —
He Said:
Damn, I can’t even get one girl to date me, and you’ve landed two guys . . well done indeed! Although I have to say, you’ve landed yourself in quite the sticky situation. There’s really no easy way to say this . . . you’re screwed. What I feel you should do is tell them. Tell them both. Staying with them both will end up blowing up in your face when the truth comes out. Just telling one will be a temporary fix but then if the truth ever comes out to the other one . . . then . . . Boom! By telling them both what is going on, you may lose both of them. So be it. Although if one (or both) of these guys really care about you, you may be surprised at their willingness to move forward and forget about the whole ordeal.
She Said: I don’t think that the problem is who to be with during the holidays.
The problem is that you have two boyfriends in the first place. I think it is OK to date more than one person at a time to see who you would like to ultimately be with. But someone who has two boyfriends sounds insecure. Are you not OK with yourself that you have to have a boyfriend when you are home and one when you are at school? If I were you, I would break up with both of them to really search what I want in a relationship. Obviously these guys don’t have it, or you wouldn’t need both. But from what I gather from your short question, is that you, being the type of person you are, wouldn’t do that. So then, I say break up with one, the one you like least, if that is at all possible for you. And if you really insist on keeping both (which is a poor, immature decision) then I guess you’re going to have to lie to one of them. But it’s okay, I’m sure you’re used to that.