Booze Cruise

What can be said about the Cruise to Nowhere that isn’t felt by its participants the morning after? Gilligan and his band of friends got off easy in their three hour tour but the students of UB which went on the Cruise to Nowhere – I’m sure – did not expect to embark on such a journey. The day seemed to be going off without a hitch with everyone showing up a good half hour before departure time, as requested, until about 4:30, when nearly twenty students and guests stood at the steps of two full to capacity and slightly beyond buses. What were they to do? Leave? Hit the bar till we all got back? No. Actually, the staff on hand for the event organized a couple of vans to drive people from the clock by Mandeville Hall (our departure point) to the harbor in Greenwich (destination). Some drove themselves there and got the most sober individual they could find to drive them back. >From inside the bus I could see several people walking away from the group of stragglers, giving up so quickly at a chance for an early evening not ever to be forgotten, and for some, never to be remembered. One bus experienced minor difficulty operating on its way to the event. Although it did not get too ugly within the already cramped bus, having over forty very eager-to-drink college students trapped within, it was not a pretty sight. The bus began moving and tensions died down quickly. A good hour later, we all made it to the harbor where a crew awaited to help everyone get on the boat, which was a bit rocky. The outer deck was empty. The first deck was completely empty. The bar deck was packed tighter than a womb. Everyone and their best friend hit the bar……….hard. At one point the bartenders were so overworked that they called for some help from the kitchen. They then had two men making mixed drinks ranging in size, color and intensity, and one serving beer only. One by one, bottles of rum, whiskey, bourbon, vodka, and every kind of mixer there is, were swept away by the alcoholic droves that attacked the bar in seven minute intervals. The beers and the drinks were not the only things available to the participants. There was a fairly small dance floor where far too many people were dancing, but no one was really sober enough to care that much. The food offered was rather tasty as well. At first, the liner offered fruits and vegetables and some cheese with crackers. Then, as the drinks were consumed, the real food came out and everyone was enjoying Swedish meatballs and chicken teriyaki on sticks. Let us not forget the oh-so-good bagel bites that everyone bickered over. At one point I saw someone swap a beer for some bagel bites. An even trade I think. What goes in must come out and the lines for the bathrooms were nearly unbearable, but the staff managed to keep things clean. The students and guests in attendance did not act as if they were animals, and helped keep things nice and neat. A real blessing considering we were on a boat and there was nowhere else to “go”. The entire night, in review, was a success, and as I helped shaky students off the boat. I did not see a single unhappy face. Maybe it was the booze. Maybe it was the cruise. Who knows and who cares. If you were there you had a great time and if you weren’t, too bad, but hopefully we’ll see you next year.